My reality is brighter than your dreams are.
He punched it in the butt!
My lovely followers, please follow this blog immediately!
Some of Ye greatest tweets:
On responsibility:
“I hate when I’m on a flight and I wake up with a water bottle next to me like oh great now I gotta be responsible for this water bottle”
“Sometimes I push the elevator close button on people running towards the elevator. I just need my own elevator sometimes, my 7 floor sanctuary”
“Man… ninjas are kind of cool… I just don’t know any personally.”
On giving credit where credit is due:
“I would like to thank Julius Caesar for originating my hairstyle”
“Fur pillows are actually hard to sleep on”
“I know everybody at Rolling Stone had one question on there mind… and the answer is… yes, the shoes are Dreis”
“I specifically ordered persian rugs with cherub imagery!!! What do I have to do to get a simple persian rug with cherub imagery uuuugh”
“Sometimes I get emotional over fonts”
On knowing your strengths:
“I make awesome decisions in bike stores!!!”
“Never do coke with an intern … they may not be 21”
“She asked when is fashion week…. uuuum… I thought it was every week??!!”
“My favorite unit of measurement is ‘a shit load.’”
On productive use of all 140 characters in a tweet:
“hahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahah aaand 140”
“No seriously … I said my teeth are real diamonds… these are not fronts… I replaced my bottom row of teeth with diamonds”
On how to ring in the New Year (tweeted on Jan 1, 2011):
“You can basically say anything to someone on an email or text as long as you put LOL at the end”
“I have started a new company and I’m so excited about the name…. it’s got the best name ever of all companies of all time!!!….”
G-Eazy - Plastic Dreams ft. Johanna Fay
Brandon Roy played in his first Target Center home game as a Timberwolves player last night, scoring 13 points en route to an 82-75 preseason victory over the Chicago Bulls. (Photo by David Sherman)
